Sometimes there's nothing you can do

Note to Self:

Sometimes there really isn't anything you can do. And that just sucks. 

I'm a fixer. Either I fix things or I help other people fix things. That's just my mindset. Give me a problem and I'll figure out how to solve it. I guess that's the "engineer" in me--for those of you who don't know, my dad is an engineer and everyone expected me to follow in his footsteps. I hate engineering and math and science, but I'm fairly good at it. Anyway . . . I've always kind of made it my job to fix things. Somehow it seemed that I always attracted problems . . . whether it be things or people. And then I made it my job to do what I could to help out. And I love doing it. I'm going into psychology because I want to help people . . . and it's a psychologist's job to help people help themselves which is even better. 

Well, in the last couple years especially, I've learned that sometimes . . . there really isn't anything I can do. I can try and try and try again . . . but it doesn't make a difference. And that just sucks. 

Sometimes there isn't an answer. Sometimes two plus two just doesn't equal four . . . it just doesn't. Sometimes people need to figure it out on their own and any "help" you try to give them will really only do harm. And sometimes there's nothing anyone can do... it just is what it is. 

This has been one of the life lessons that's been the hardest for me to learn. . . but also one of the most rewarding. I used to beat my self up about not being able to help someone or fix something. And yeah, sometimes I still do. It still kills me to sit back and do nothing . . . but sometimes that's all you can do. 

Sometimes you have to sit on the sidelines. Be there in case the people you love come to you for help and give you something you can actually do. Sometimes you just have to sit on the sidelines, pray, and trust that God knows what he is doing. Trust that, somehow, everything will work out. 

I know this is short . . . and kind of vague. But I don't know what else to say.  I just feel like I needed to say this. Because it's something that I am personally working on learning . . . and I figure I can't be the only one. Thanks everyone! 

One Little Word - 2014

Note to Self:

Be honest. If you set resolutions . . . you're really just setting yourself up for disappointment. That's why I found One Little Word . . . 

For those of you who have been following my blog, I'd first like to apologize. I only made five posts last year . . . and that's pathetic! I'm going to try to do so much better this year. 

Last year I started a new New Year's tradition called "One Little Word." The idea came from a blog I found (http://www.lizlamoreux.com/be-present-be-here/a-word-to-guide-the-way.html) The original idea came from Ali Edwards (http://www.bigpictureclasses.com/onelittleword2013.php) and the idea is this:

"A single word can be a powerful thing. It can be the ripple in the pond that changes everything. It can be sharp and biting or rich and soft and slow. From my own personal experience, it can be a catalyst for enriching your life.

In 2006, I began a tradition of choosing one word for myself each January--a word that I can focus on, meditate on, and reflect upon as I go about my daily life. My words have included play, peace, vitality, nurture, story, light and up. These words have each become a part of my life in one way or another. They've been embedded into who I am, and into who I'm becoming. They've been what I've needed (and didn't know I needed). They've helped me to breathe deeper, to see clearer and to grow." - Ali Edwards

So for 2013 I gave it a shot. The word I chose was "courage". 

In my last blogpost I talked more about my experiences in 2013 as I focused on this One Little Word (http://notetoselfcollection.blogspot.com/2013/12/courage.html).

I went through a similar struggle choosing a word this year . . . but, like last year, there was one word that just stuck no matter how hard I tried to focus on other words to get a better idea. And the word is: 

Not "commit" as in "commit a crime" . . . although that would be funny if you knew me and how likely I am to commit a crime . . . haha 

I mean the commit as in pledge, bind, obligate, act, carry out, do . . . Commit. Committed. Commitment. 

I've never really thought of myself as someone who didn't do that . . . but it's the word that stuck. And as I thought about this word more and more the last couple days coming up to the new year, I realized that maybe I really could work on it more.  

Like last year, I really have no idea what 2014 will bring. After my experience this last year with One Little Word, though, I trust that somehow this word is exactly what I will need to get me through. 

Let this year be the year I commit to:

• School. Every class. Every assignment. No more half-a** work. 
• Friendships and relationships. Because they're worth it. 
• Family. Making them a priority no matter how far away I am.
• The Gospel of Jesus Christ. In everything that I do.
• My life. Living it the way that I believe I should. 
• Being happy. 

I've never been so excited to welcome in a new year before. In all honesty, 2013 was a really hard year. I'm sure many of you would agree. However, I learned and grew more than I knew I could. I'm proud of the things I've accomplished, but I know I have a long way to go. I pray that in 2014 I can continue to make progress and that I can make it a great year. Take each day at a time, because that's all we can do. 

I am committed to this year :) 

Want to join me this year with One Little Word? Comment and share your word or any experiences you've had with this in the past. I strongly believe in the effectiveness of this idea and I'd love to share it with more people :) 

Have a great year everyone!